What is probably the most difficult task Tennessee parents face after a divorce? While trying to maintain financial stability might be high on the list, it is actually the art of co-parenting the children.
Set the tone with amicable proceedings
You do not have to part on bad terms. Parents will usually find it easier to co-parent if they actively pursue an amicable split. The law supports your goal by offering mediation and arbitration so that you can come to an agreement on disputed matters. Moreover, remember that you live in an equitable distribution state, which makes these discussions a necessity.
Co-parenting does not have to be a 50/50 proposition
You and your soon-to-be-ex have different schedules. You each have commitments that make some days more challenging to deal with kids. In a best-case scenario, you’ll work with the other side on an agreement that allows each parent to enjoy the maximum amount of their available time with the youngsters. If this means that you see the child 30% of the time and your ex sees them 70% of the time, but the arrangement is without strife, everyone will come out ahead.
Allow for flexibility
Things come up. You might not make it on time to pick up your youngster from soccer. Your ex may run late taking a child to school. Offer to pitch in. Even though a regular schedule is the ultimate goal, there has to be some leeway and a willingness to push through in the best interests of the offspring.
Meet in person and in public to make the big decisions
Is your teen ready to apply for a driver’s license? Should you allow your oldest to start dating? What middle school should the child attend? Is there a bullying problem at school that requires you to present a united front to the administration?
These types of discussions work best when you meet in person to sort them out. However, if you’re concerned about dealing with your ex-partner’s bad temper, you might want to meet in public where it is more likely that everyone will behave courteously.
If you’re currently thinking of filing for divorce or you find yourself in the middle of a breakup, you might benefit from discussing your situation with a family law attorney. You’ll discover that there are very few problems that can’t be worked out.